[ the text is a surprise since kovacs just figured if newt didn't know what had happened by now, he might not find out about it. he briefly wonders how, if clara or alina or even marta had fessed something up to him, since the thought of kirigan actually admitting to what he did hardly seems likely. but then he realizes it probably doesn't matter.
still, being asked the way he is means that his role in all of this wasn't part of whatever was shared. but newt has enough to figure it out. it probably also doesn't hide it much that he and kirigan parted ways in sharing a room right when the incident happened. ]
Thanks, man. I thanked you before, but I obviously didn't thank you enough. You did more than I thought and I mean, you shouldn't have had to do to that, and you did, so.
[ kovacs' immediate thought is "of course I had to" though he resists enough not to say exactly that, always hesitant to voice too much in the way of emotions. because technically he didn't, and if he'd listened to himself a year ago, he'd never had let himself get so attached to people here and whether newt lived or died wouldn't have mattered to him one way or another.
but it does matter. newt matters. ]
because I knew you wouldn't have been as pissed off about it as you should've been.
[ as pissed off as he was. ]
because you'd blame yourself. maybe even say some shit like how you deserve it or something.
I said I'd keep you safe so I did. keeping him away from you was my job. you just needed to focus on getting better.
[ it's a more affectionate kind of throttling in his case. ]
but whether you think he'd have been justified or not it doesn't change the fact that it was impulsive action. that kind of thinking's not gonna help anyone on this team.
not with how many times our emotions are used against us on these missions.
Try not to be too hard on him over it, I guess. I mean, I'd be pissed if it were anyone but me, so I'm a hypocrite but But he did help In the end, he went in my head and helped. That means something, right? It matters. He could've just told everyone I should rot.
He hasn't tried that with anyone else, has he? Trying to - y'know?
[Smother them. Kill them. Unalive them. Whatever wording you prefer.]
... Boy, it's a good thing he didn't wanna kill me anymore Definitely might have fallen asleep with him in the room back on Viv's planet. Maybe I should've been more weirded out by his questions about how I was feeling, but I was sleep deprived, so
as far as i know, not here. but some people seem to know about his past before coming here and he seems to have ambitions that can align with ulterior motives.
he might be more careful about his actions now that people are aware of what he's capable of but it doesn't mean to lower your guard.
i mean it, newt. from now on, don't be alone with him if you can help it. and if you can't get away, you contact me immediately.
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still, being asked the way he is means that his role in all of this wasn't part of whatever was shared. but newt has enough to figure it out. it probably also doesn't hide it much that he and kirigan parted ways in sharing a room right when the incident happened. ]
yeah I did.
[ no point in keeping it a secret anymore. ]
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Lot to think about. A hell of a lot.]
Thanks, man.
I thanked you before, but I obviously didn't thank you enough.
You did more than I thought and
I mean, you shouldn't have had to do to that, and you did, so.
Why didn't you tell me?
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but it does matter. newt matters. ]
because I knew you wouldn't have been as pissed off about it as you should've been.
[ as pissed off as he was. ]
because you'd blame yourself.
maybe even say some shit like how you deserve it or something.
I said I'd keep you safe so I did.
keeping him away from you was my job.
you just needed to focus on getting better.
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It wasn't the craziest leap, is all.
Something wearing my face had hurt everyone.
Understandable knee jerk reaction, wanting to throttle me!
Pretty sure you wanna throttle me all the time, too.
[is my joke masking the fact that i'm reaffirming your assessment of my guiltiness]
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[ it's a more affectionate kind of throttling in his case. ]
but whether you think he'd have been justified or not
it doesn't change the fact that it was impulsive action.
that kind of thinking's not gonna help anyone on this team.
not with how many times our emotions are used against us on these missions.
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Try not to be too hard on him over it, I guess.
I mean, I'd be pissed if it were anyone but me, so I'm a hypocrite but
But he did help
In the end, he went in my head and helped.
That means something, right? It matters.
He could've just told everyone I should rot.
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[ kovacs isn't entirely convinced kirigan helped out of good will, so a move like that doesn't earn his soft side. ]
but i've heard other warnings.
from people who know him better than we do.
so i'd still be careful around him. try not to be alone in the same room if you can help it.
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He hasn't tried that with anyone else, has he?
Trying to - y'know?
[Smother them. Kill them. Unalive them. Whatever wording you prefer.]
... Boy, it's a good thing he didn't wanna kill me anymore
Definitely might have fallen asleep with him in the room back on Viv's planet.
Maybe I should've been more weirded out by his questions about how I was feeling, but I was sleep deprived, so
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but some people seem to know about his past before coming here and he seems to have ambitions that can align with ulterior motives.
he might be more careful about his actions now that people are aware of what he's capable of but it doesn't mean to lower your guard.
i mean it, newt.
from now on, don't be alone with him if you can help it.
and if you can't get away, you contact me immediately.
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I'll be careful.
MORE careful, I mean.
No alone time if I can help it, I promise.
Just don't get yourself into any crazy trouble on my behalf, huh?
I feel like I've caused puh-lenty the last few months.