[ i still love you. it's strange to hear her say that word — still — when he'd never heard her say it before, when he'd never said it himself. it's not like it hadn't existed; what he felt for clara in those days had been strong enough to send him in a whirl, to launch him ever faster towards making the decision he made in wanting to save her life. it isn't that the feeling never existed, that he hadn't suspected something being felt for him in return, but—
it's almost jarring to hear now, when he's already stepped away from the alternate path where he would have run away with her anywhere in the universe.
but he knows that it is different now, without her having to clarify it. because it's just as different for him too, even if he still cares about her to the point where he'd always make the choice to save her life.
the difference is he doesn't want to do any running away anymore, not with her, not with anyone. the difference is he's found someone to want to stay for.
despite the brief wonder of those words, there's no other uncertainty that surfaces, exhaling softly to the touch of her hand at his cheek. ]
I know. [ the guilt inside of him isn't about old feelings; it's about knowing just how much she would do for him in turn, and the knowledge that there's plenty that he still hasn't told her — about what he is losing. ] But you don't have to worry about me.
[They never had said the words, but Clara knows for a fact that there had been feelings anyway. It had been sudden and intense, and so strong that she likely would've taken the leap and pulled him with her. But she doesn't even stop to think about how her saying what she is now would be disorienting, how it may not even be appropriate for her to mention.
She isn't looking to rekindle anything, doesn't want to try and lure him into false hope or empty dreams that are sweet but can't really happen. There's no need for either of them to run away now, not when they both have what they need in the people they're with.
But that doesn't change the fact she'd go to extremes to protect him, particularly from the decision he's made to try and save her. Her hand lingers against him for a moment before dropping away, her smile turning sad as he tries to get her to not worry about him.]
Yeah, that's not working on me this time. Nice try, though.
[She's allowed to worry, just the same as he is about her. It's part of the deal when you're close to someone, the relationship they used to have blossoming into a deep friendship.]
I'm gonna worry. Because you're not being completely honest with me, are you.
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it's almost jarring to hear now, when he's already stepped away from the alternate path where he would have run away with her anywhere in the universe.
but he knows that it is different now, without her having to clarify it. because it's just as different for him too, even if he still cares about her to the point where he'd always make the choice to save her life.
the difference is he doesn't want to do any running away anymore, not with her, not with anyone. the difference is he's found someone to want to stay for.
despite the brief wonder of those words, there's no other uncertainty that surfaces, exhaling softly to the touch of her hand at his cheek. ]
I know. [ the guilt inside of him isn't about old feelings; it's about knowing just how much she would do for him in turn, and the knowledge that there's plenty that he still hasn't told her — about what he is losing. ] But you don't have to worry about me.
no subject
She isn't looking to rekindle anything, doesn't want to try and lure him into false hope or empty dreams that are sweet but can't really happen. There's no need for either of them to run away now, not when they both have what they need in the people they're with.
But that doesn't change the fact she'd go to extremes to protect him, particularly from the decision he's made to try and save her. Her hand lingers against him for a moment before dropping away, her smile turning sad as he tries to get her to not worry about him.]
Yeah, that's not working on me this time. Nice try, though.
[She's allowed to worry, just the same as he is about her. It's part of the deal when you're close to someone, the relationship they used to have blossoming into a deep friendship.]
I'm gonna worry. Because you're not being completely honest with me, are you.