[She's seen him smile so many different ways, and right in that moment, she realizes that it'd be nice to get to hear him laugh too. This isn't the right time to be tossing around attempts at jokes or humor, so she files away the desire to pull up sometime later when they're in private.
He probably wouldn't want anyone else here to know he's capable of things like laughter.
Her smile is as tired as the look that's in her eyes, the exhaustion from the mission finally catching up to her. But there's warmth in her gaze as she looks up to him, her eyes meeting his. The fondness in her smile is evident as well, though if he can't see the affection there he's likely to feel it as she gingerly slips her good hand over to hold his.]
And I'll be sure to make it up to you later.
[In the event she does trip and he catches her, that is. Or maybe she's referring to making up for the fact she was just nonsensically cross. Who knows?]
He probably wouldn't want anyone else here to know he's capable of things like laughter.
Her smile is as tired as the look that's in her eyes, the exhaustion from the mission finally catching up to her. But there's warmth in her gaze as she looks up to him, her eyes meeting his. The fondness in her smile is evident as well, though if he can't see the affection there he's likely to feel it as she gingerly slips her good hand over to hold his.]
And I'll be sure to make it up to you later.
[In the event she does trip and he catches her, that is. Or maybe she's referring to making up for the fact she was just nonsensically cross. Who knows?]
Takeshi, I'm fine.
[She insists, holding in a chuckle through her slight exasperation. It's almost amusing how he went from trying so hard to seem like a bad boy asshole to holding hands and showing her concern in public. It's always funny how these things work. Going from zero to completely consuming in no time flat. She wonders where the switch happened, whether it was the sex or something that fell into place sometime after.
There's also a realization that she's just said his name out loud. And while they're not exactly surrounded by people, the walls have ears here. And he definitely doesn't introduce himself by his first name to most people.]
You don't mind me calling you that, do you? Where someone else might hear, I mean. Is it a problem?
[She insists, holding in a chuckle through her slight exasperation. It's almost amusing how he went from trying so hard to seem like a bad boy asshole to holding hands and showing her concern in public. It's always funny how these things work. Going from zero to completely consuming in no time flat. She wonders where the switch happened, whether it was the sex or something that fell into place sometime after.
There's also a realization that she's just said his name out loud. And while they're not exactly surrounded by people, the walls have ears here. And he definitely doesn't introduce himself by his first name to most people.]
You don't mind me calling you that, do you? Where someone else might hear, I mean. Is it a problem?
[There's a give and a take when it comes to navigating figuring him out. Most times she thinks she has him pegged completely. Others, he surprises her. This is one of the times he gives her a bit of a surprise. Her eyebrow arches at the realization that basically everyone where he's from sucks.
More and more she understands exactly why he's as abrasive and rough around the edges as he can be. With her, he tries. Or maybe the softness he shows her just comes naturally. Her hand shifts in his, turning just enough that she can squeeze in return.
This conversation is good. It's keeping her mind off the pain she's feeling, and helps keep her grounded.]
I'll be sure to keep that in mind.
[She says in a way that sounds like trouble for him later, accompanied by a mischievous little glint in her eye that shines through the exhaustion. What sort of ridiculous names could she call him, she wonders?]
But just so we're in agreement, I'm laying claim to calling you Tak while we're here.
[Is she playing at being possessive to tease him? Or is she being serious? It's not likely she's going to let him know. The smile she's trying to turn her head away to hide is answer enough.]
More and more she understands exactly why he's as abrasive and rough around the edges as he can be. With her, he tries. Or maybe the softness he shows her just comes naturally. Her hand shifts in his, turning just enough that she can squeeze in return.
This conversation is good. It's keeping her mind off the pain she's feeling, and helps keep her grounded.]
I'll be sure to keep that in mind.
[She says in a way that sounds like trouble for him later, accompanied by a mischievous little glint in her eye that shines through the exhaustion. What sort of ridiculous names could she call him, she wonders?]
But just so we're in agreement, I'm laying claim to calling you Tak while we're here.
[Is she playing at being possessive to tease him? Or is she being serious? It's not likely she's going to let him know. The smile she's trying to turn her head away to hide is answer enough.]
In that case - [She pauses just long enough to use her hold on his hand to pull herself in closer to try and steal a kiss. It's harder now, since she can't use her other hand to tug him in to her. But she figures he'll realize what she's aiming for and bend down to make it easier on her.]
I insist you meet me in the shower later. No arguing, do as you're told.
[It's whispered as she pulls away, and she's proud of the fact she managed to get every single word out without blushing or laughing at herself.
They're just about at the infirmary now, which is exactly why she's just kissed him. Another quick peck to the lips has her reluctantly pulling away, backing up until she's closer to the infirmary's door than to him. She flips her good hand up in a little wave, fingers already missing the feel of his against hers. But she knows he'll be there for her later, and she's independent enough to not need to ask him to come with her inside. She can take care of this herself. ]
I insist you meet me in the shower later. No arguing, do as you're told.
[It's whispered as she pulls away, and she's proud of the fact she managed to get every single word out without blushing or laughing at herself.
They're just about at the infirmary now, which is exactly why she's just kissed him. Another quick peck to the lips has her reluctantly pulling away, backing up until she's closer to the infirmary's door than to him. She flips her good hand up in a little wave, fingers already missing the feel of his against hers. But she knows he'll be there for her later, and she's independent enough to not need to ask him to come with her inside. She can take care of this herself. ]
[There's an audible sigh of relief. She had worried that he thought she really did think of him like that. And part of her knew that couldn't be the case, that he was just keeping things between them quiet. She appreciates that.]
Even if I did, it's not like I'd let you know about it now.
[Ha ha. That's her weak attempt at dry humor.]
I'm sorry for bringing attention to things.
Even if I did, it's not like I'd let you know about it now.
[Ha ha. That's her weak attempt at dry humor.]
I'm sorry for bringing attention to things.
[Oh no, she's doing the smiling thing again. This time though, she doesn't have to worry about hiding it.]
It wouldn't bother me either. If people knew. We just have to be careful about how the Doctor finds out.
[It hadn't gone well the last relationship she got into. Not that she's even sure that's what this is. Even though it 100% is.]
It wouldn't bother me either. If people knew. We just have to be careful about how the Doctor finds out.
[It hadn't gone well the last relationship she got into. Not that she's even sure that's what this is. Even though it 100% is.]
[she takes a moment to replay through her mind the advice she had gotten from the Doctor back when Porridge had proposed to her. Then comes the Doctor's reaction to Danny.
Her smile grows tight and thin. This is fine.]
I'm not sure what to expect from either of them. But I know that their opinion wouldn't change what I want.
[She pauses, blurting out this next part before she can think better of it.]
Does that mean we're putting a label on things now?
Her smile grows tight and thin. This is fine.]
I'm not sure what to expect from either of them. But I know that their opinion wouldn't change what I want.
[She pauses, blurting out this next part before she can think better of it.]
Does that mean we're putting a label on things now?
[Maybe this is a conversation better had face to face. It feels like something better discussed close together. She's just...going to be trying to hunt his ass down now.]
Not everything needs a label.
[She points out her opinion on that, heading into the kitchen to see if he's in there raiding the booze. Nope. She keeps right on going.]
But when it comes to us, and what we feel? A label could feel nice.
[She can't bring herself to outright say yes, in case he rejects that idea. She's not sure she could take it, so she's being cautiously optimistic right now.]
Not everything needs a label.
[She points out her opinion on that, heading into the kitchen to see if he's in there raiding the booze. Nope. She keeps right on going.]
But when it comes to us, and what we feel? A label could feel nice.
[She can't bring herself to outright say yes, in case he rejects that idea. She's not sure she could take it, so she's being cautiously optimistic right now.]
I figured that was the case. Which is why I don't have to have a label.
[She heads through the common area before making her way to the sunlight room to look around. It's not that hard to find him here, the cloud of cigarette smoke leading her right to him.
She's in one of her little dresses, not exactly meant for the artificial chill in the air. When she sits on the bench beside him, it's close enough she can feel some of his body heat to help keep her warm.
It's quiet here. Pretty romantic of a setting, too. Almost perfect for this conversation.]
What is it you want? You say you've never done this before. Do you even want to?
[She heads through the common area before making her way to the sunlight room to look around. It's not that hard to find him here, the cloud of cigarette smoke leading her right to him.
She's in one of her little dresses, not exactly meant for the artificial chill in the air. When she sits on the bench beside him, it's close enough she can feel some of his body heat to help keep her warm.
It's quiet here. Pretty romantic of a setting, too. Almost perfect for this conversation.]
What is it you want? You say you've never done this before. Do you even want to?
[She catches that anyone else, and it puts one of those ridiculously smitten smiles on her face. One that she tries to hide by ducking her head for a moment.
Rather than saying anything at first, she simply reaches over to rest her hand atop his.
She's come to accept the fact that she's going to leave this place and go back to face her death. She can do it on her own time, leaving her with a bittersweet sense of near-panic. She wants to protect the Doctor from having to experience her loss. She can keep him from having to completely betray his moral code because of her. It's selfish to want something like a lover or a relationship, cruel to even consider putting a label on something that has a set expiration date.
She's resigned herself to the fact that maybe she isn't meant to live. Maybe she doesn't deserve to.
But she can help him learn how to live again in her time here. Her thumb traces along the edge of his hand.]
And here I was starting to worry you were sick of being around me.
[Her head turns as she quietly chuckles at her awful attempt at humor. Dark eyes take in the look of him out here in the chilly snow, and she commits the sight to memory.]
Rather than saying anything at first, she simply reaches over to rest her hand atop his.
She's come to accept the fact that she's going to leave this place and go back to face her death. She can do it on her own time, leaving her with a bittersweet sense of near-panic. She wants to protect the Doctor from having to experience her loss. She can keep him from having to completely betray his moral code because of her. It's selfish to want something like a lover or a relationship, cruel to even consider putting a label on something that has a set expiration date.
She's resigned herself to the fact that maybe she isn't meant to live. Maybe she doesn't deserve to.
But she can help him learn how to live again in her time here. Her thumb traces along the edge of his hand.]
And here I was starting to worry you were sick of being around me.
[Her head turns as she quietly chuckles at her awful attempt at humor. Dark eyes take in the look of him out here in the chilly snow, and she commits the sight to memory.]
[His words make her frown just a little. He's been nothing but good to her. Never been cruel, never been the asshole he claims to be. She knows this is new territory for him, and figures he just doesn't think he deserves to be happy.]
You've been nothing but good to me.
[She points out, eyebrow arching as she makes eye contact with him.]
Good for me, too. I can't say that about any of my other relationships.
[Maybe they haven't known each other for long. But he's managed to give her a tether, provide her with a touchstone to stay grounded with. Beyond that, he's given her hope. Despite their differences, they just fit. Everything feels simple and like it comes naturally with him. It almost feels too good to be true, particularly when she often thinks she doesn't deserve something like this.
But she doesn't want him to feel uncomfortable talking about this. It's with a fond smile that she looks back out to the scenery around him. There's a slight edge of urgency that wants her to lean in to kiss him, but she refrains for now. There's something about the simplicity of sitting here, holding hands and talking quietly that feels intimate in a new way. She does, however, keep their hands joined as she leans over to rest her head against his shoulder.]
You've been nothing but good to me.
[She points out, eyebrow arching as she makes eye contact with him.]
Good for me, too. I can't say that about any of my other relationships.
[Maybe they haven't known each other for long. But he's managed to give her a tether, provide her with a touchstone to stay grounded with. Beyond that, he's given her hope. Despite their differences, they just fit. Everything feels simple and like it comes naturally with him. It almost feels too good to be true, particularly when she often thinks she doesn't deserve something like this.
But she doesn't want him to feel uncomfortable talking about this. It's with a fond smile that she looks back out to the scenery around him. There's a slight edge of urgency that wants her to lean in to kiss him, but she refrains for now. There's something about the simplicity of sitting here, holding hands and talking quietly that feels intimate in a new way. She does, however, keep their hands joined as she leans over to rest her head against his shoulder.]
[She picks up on the fact that he doesn't correct her. And she isn't sure if it's because he desperately wants to believe it, or if he doesn't want to discount the way she feels. Saying something right after that feels like it cheapens the sentiment he's just put out in the open, so she allows things to slip into a comfortable silence for a while.
She watches the snow and tries to imagine a normal life together where they could go to the park and do something mundane like this. It wouldn't suit either of them, she quickly decides. They both deserve a happy life, but neither of them would be content just being idle. Even if that's exactly what's so nice about being here with him now.
They don't have to do anything. No words are needed. It's companionship at its most basic form. ]
Daisy's coming over for a bit tonight.
[She eventually speaks up, lifting her head off his shoulder. As warm as he is and as close as they're sitting, she's starting to get a bit of a chill just being still.]
Want me to come find you after we're done drinking and gossiping?
She watches the snow and tries to imagine a normal life together where they could go to the park and do something mundane like this. It wouldn't suit either of them, she quickly decides. They both deserve a happy life, but neither of them would be content just being idle. Even if that's exactly what's so nice about being here with him now.
They don't have to do anything. No words are needed. It's companionship at its most basic form. ]
Daisy's coming over for a bit tonight.
[She eventually speaks up, lifting her head off his shoulder. As warm as he is and as close as they're sitting, she's starting to get a bit of a chill just being still.]
Want me to come find you after we're done drinking and gossiping?
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